Had my annual mammogram on June 9th. I was all set to announce that i was a 13 year breast cancer survivor.
But, my right breast had other ideas.
Back in 2002, when i had Breast Cancer, it was in my right breast. i chose partial mastectomy (i was 45 and i have no idea why i gave a crap about keeping part of a my body that was a troublemaker). Over the years, i'd had a couple of worrisome spots. Needle biopsies were done, and always nothing to worry about.
Not this time. This time there is a thickening in the breast that was not there a year ago. The doctor said with my history, she wants me to see a surgeon and get an MRI. So, I'm waiting for the scheduler to call and get me in.
MRI. Magnetic resonance imaging. Basically it looks at me without opening me up. i HATE this machine.
you lie on that table, and it puts you in the tube deal. I never EVER knew i was claustrophobic until i went into it. the top of the inside is literally a couple of inches above your face. When i realized i was in there, i started crying. Then i decided to just close my eyes and sing a song. the only one i could remember ALL the words to was 'Jesus Loves Me'. I sang it over and over and over again. Finally they brought me out, and i was sweating and crying. They asked me if i was alright... i wanted to yell at them, but realized they were being genuine.
There is an open MRI which i had a few years ago (for my back)
Yes, it was open, on the sides, and nowhere NEAR as bad as the other one, but still close to the face. I appreciate what the machine has to do, but i'd love to just punch it's face so that it can suffer too. (shhh, i know)
Anyway, this thickening might be nothing, but could be something. The doctors are on top of it, so I'll just wait for results.
if you are a praying type peep, by all means, pray. I appreciate any and all prayers, good thoughts and comments. If it is my time, i'm going down swinging. If not, then, as usual, i will continue to give it all i've got!
I can say that i'm sick to death of 2015 and need it to be done.